Story behind "ChaOs"

Thursday, December 10, 2009

"ChaOs" is well chaos that happens when you don't accept your blackness. Plain and simple, that's how the name came about. I did this piece a week after "I & I", on another summer night of 2008. This piece was more of an outlet though. Releasing anger and sprinting to the one thing that I have control of, my art. This was also the time where I wanted locs.

In my brainwashed childhood stage, I was never fond of locs because I always observed and heard old Haitian women mounting their lips in disgust, doing the wouch!!! gade gade gade and sucking their teeth tchk when a loc wearer would strut by. I was always confused when the grown ups would do that because although I wasn't fond of locs during my puerile stages of development, I always saw something regal in loc-wearers. The only reason why the thought of not having locs existed, was simply because I didn't want to be an outcast amongst my Haitians.

Fast forwarding back to 2008, I started considering locing ever since Afro Costa Ricans and Panamanians told me I would look like a nubian princess if I ever decided to loc my afro. One Afro-Panamanian knitted a big rasta hat for me as a reminder of what they taught me about Rastafarian and dreadlocks. After my study abroad experience, I told my friends "I'm gonna loc my hair but not yet though" and a lot of them said "Yea right". I told my mom and she said kisa? Ou p'ale fe'w tankou rasta? hehey! and told me to do go something better with myself. So in the mist of all this frustration, I sat in my corner and mod podged magazine papers. This wasn't one of those in my trance moment though. I really thought about this one and wanted to show blackness as beautiful as possible, abstractly showing the different beliefs and thoughts surrounding blackness.

I'm thinking of doing another similar piece in the future but on a larger scale.


wouch: eww
gade: look
kisa: what
Ou p'ale fe'w tankou rasta: You're going to look like a rasta
hehey: omg, wtf, are you kidding me